Seal-ing the Deal

No, we're not advocating the clubbing of adorable baby seals.  Instead, as friends of capitalism and game theory, we are crafting a response to the current political quagmire (the one that followed on the coattails of a thrillingly muggy weather pattern to the swamp that we call our Capital).  Our response follows the old adage "if you can't beat them, join them." Only we suggest instead of joining them, we profit from them.

Here's the deal: every kamper gets $100 to invest in the markets.  Do it wisely.  Fear is a funny thing.  Good luck.

Stand By Your Bat-Phone

A local neighborhood watch group recently commissioned Kamp Koop to design and build a Bat-Mobile for their nightly patrols.  We ask that any interested kampers amend their summer plans and return to Kamp to help with this challenging off-season project.

Cosmology of Bad Music

In honor of the new Electronic Music Center, The Meandering Misanthropic Musicians proposed a new coffee table book with the intention of tackling the theory of music gone wrong. Current ideas for chapters include the following:

1. Giorgio Moroder

2. "Dude, this guy is the best guitar player ever."

3. Falco

4. Painfully Nostalgic/Dramatic Interpretations of the Canon 

5. "He's an amazing musician, he plays all the instruments in the band."

Please submit any suggestions, photographs or essays to your bunk house leader. 

Loop At Me Now ft. DJ Jewd LAW

A generous donation from Ma Bells & Whistles, Inc. allowed us to refurbish The Koop Electronic Music Center, which has been in disrepair since the Casio Keyboard was released.  Early reviews by kampers have been extremely promising.  Late last night we held the inaugural "Don't Dilly Daley with the Delay Pedal" jam session.  A select group of kampers, who earlier in the evening correctly recited their circle of 5ths, performed improvised music of the ambient variety while RC Cola through Twizzler straws were enjoyed by all.  If there is enough interest in a late summer session focused on modular synths than we will hold a bake sale to raise money for the necessary equipment.  A warm thank you goes out to the kampers who recorded a 45 minute version of Taps onto reel to reel using only a jew harp and loop pedal.

Stalled

As suggested in a recent notice, we at kamp koop attempted to send the ninth variant of the science club's chemically propelled rocket to the planet Venus.  Although our attempt failed, the spirit was strong and the experience was sweetened with nearly seven minutes of radio contact with it in low earth orbit.  The rocket burned up somewhere  over Franz Josef Land; it did not make landfall.  The kampers that finalized the construction of the vessel are some of our "summer stragglers" who were simply looking for a project to occupy their time until the next session of kamp opens.  It appears they will be rewarded with a trip to the Large Hadron Collider (run by a former kamper) where we expect to see that chemicals are an inefficient and "old-fashioned" approach to storing/making energy.

Rocket Number Nine Take off for the Planet Venus

Zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, up in the air.
Up, zoom, up, zoom, up in the air.

End of Quarter Trips

As of yesterday, another quarter is complete.  There were two successful events this past weekend that marked the end:

1.  The kampers in the nautical program used their knowledge to complete a successful one night voyage aboard the flagship of the kamp koop armada.  

2. The kampers in the arts track headed to a nearby town to experience 20 th century music in two distinct and noteworthy settings.

Stay posted for selected personal accounts from a few star kampers

Karaoke

Dominique Strauss-Kahn is not and never was the featured DJ this week.

Peter's Projection

Memorial Day weekend provided the exact excuse we needed to grill Chicago-Style "dogs" for the kampers.  The results were astounding.  A special thanks goes to the Art Institute for their donation of the homemade mustard; it was the kamp-wide favorite of the day.  To capture the zeitgeist of eras bygone, the kounselors once again  honored the finest of blatantly archaic east coast traditions by eating their decadent-dogs in fashionable white linen outfits (provided by Chanel this year, styles now available in the gift shop with tailoring included).  Since many of the kids are soon off to travel with their parents, siblings, maids and nurses, we decided it was fitting to work a geography lesson into the weekend by panting a Peter's Projection Map of the World on the main quad upon which the kids marked their summer destinations with their initials in Arabic.

Mr. Smith Goes to the Koop

Kampers, lest we all forget, the Koop's summer session is officially right around the korner. That being the case, we thought a little fanfare was in order.  The Jimmy Stewart Estate has agreed to lend us Mr. Stewart's "likeness" for the first day of kamp.  With the "likeness" at our disposal,we are going to mount a quasi-original screenplay, written in round table fashion by the executive board of the Koop.  The title is apt: Mr. Smith Goes to the Koop.  The premise has changed only slightly (girls are now included in Smith's proposed kamp legislation).  The filibuster is in good form and we hope to perpetuate
that sentiment throughout the balmy season.  

*Let the rumors be quashed now, Sam Seaborn shall NOT be the keynote speaker at this year's kamp kommencement.

Red Tape Removal

After a three month fact finding study, we learned that the registration process for the kulinary workshop was unnecessarily confusing and weighted toward admitting Midwesterners.  In our ongoing effort to eliminate inefficiency, we simplified the forms and hope to see a rise in attendance. 

Pearly Whites

Kamp Koop would like to reiterate that as an institution of betterment, we are quite fond of dental hygiene.  Your teeth are the best friend you've got.  Remember to see your dentist once every six months.

Little Blue Pills

It looks like our friends at Pfizer sent a few too many complimentary boxes of their best selling product to the counselors.   We plan to evenly distribute the remaining supply amongst the kampers and local wildlife.

What's in your Bumper?

Tonight we have a special guest from the local law school who will present a 20 minute lecture about privacy in America.  We plan to follow with a Q & A session and a group trip to the kamp motor pool where we will search the vehicles for some of the fancy new sticky GPS tracker toys that are continuously getting stuck on the cars driven by our prestigious Kamp Koop journalism team.

Unexpected Visitors

At 3:09 PM twelve high-profile Al Qaeda operatives were discovered and captured in a network of caves under Ruxton, a town roughly ten kilometers north of Kamp Koop.  It appears the extremists were holed-up for the better part of a decade in an effort to avoid the melee in Afghanistan and northern Pakistan.  They were discovered by an employee of Graul's Market on what at first appeared to be a standard delivery run.  The area is now safe and secure.  All of the parents were called to confirm the well being of the kampers.